Nympho Madness
I never though in a million years you could fuck yourself until you psychically make it so you can't fuck anymore. I did this to myself just recently. I fucked for so long that I was saying, "fuck you sleep" & not sleeping.
Let me get this out there so we all understand. I was not on any drugs during this time. All the energy that kept me awake was pure pleasure cum energy. I don't know what else to call it but the more I had sex the more energized I felt.
That is why earlier, I thought that I could of been a sex vampire. It was as if the cum was feeding my soul and giving my body all this life and energy.
Then my pussy got swollen from fucking for hours and hours. I can honestly say, I think I fucked solid for 8 hours and it felt fucking AMAZING!
The first few months after I lost my virginity I really did not experience sex as it was meant to be. I still fucked though, even though it hurt so bad, I would cry for hours after.
I would ask god
"why is sex so painful because the pain hurts so bad it makes me not want to have sex. I enjoy pleasing others so much that I put up with the pain because it brings them pleasure. I don't know if I am strong enough to keep doing this. I love people as much as I can, but the pain I have to endure to remain alive, is it worth it?"
At this time in my life, I was losing everything in my life.
Some people can say, they know what it is like losing everything. I have truly lost everything. There is a difference because when you truly lose everything, that includes your family, friends, all material objects.
Yes, it sounds like I making this shit up but I'm not. I don't care what other people think anymore, I just hope my words help other people. I hope it makes some perverts dicks hard because that turns me on.
God showed me the answer to why he brought all the pain into my world. He showed me the world in a new light that I have never seen it before. He answered my question on why he did what he did.
To become balanced in this world you have to understand why good is good and bad is bad. It is simple science but took me a long time to figure it out. I still don't understand it all because I don't want to.
We create our own life as we have gods blood in our body. If you project positive light, positive outcomes will come out of it. It is the same with negative light, if you project it all the time, negative light is what you will produce.
Whatever light you are projecting attracts the people with the same light.
Before you know it you are surrounded by the light of people you are projecting! So if you want to be a happy person around people who are cool, project a positive light and see what happens.
This sounds easy, but its not. It is really easy to sway to the negative light. I am learning how to avoid the negative light but sense I have seen it so much in my life its hard. I am use to the negative people trying to drag me back down the black hole.
I keep pulling myself out and back into the light where the angels play but its hard staying there as well. My wings keep falling off sometimes and I fall back into the dark pit.
This time my wings are getting stronger now and I really don't want to go back into the black hole of negativity!
Do I think I am a angle ? In my mind I feel like I am in the matrix and I kinda see the world like that. I don't tell people what I can see because I am trying really hard to appear sane to the rest of the sane world.
So no, I do not think I am a angle.
In my dreams, I am though. I fly around the world in a cool Crystal UFO! I spy on people cause its really funny spying on people. I then zoom away if they look back because I hate getting caught.
When I get caught, I usually get frozen or something in my dream and then it is HELL. I feel like days go by and I have only slept 3 hours!!! In my dream I am there for days and suck. I hate getting captured by people cause they are so cruel and keep me locked in rooms and other devices and I can't get out.
I sleep with like 10 dream catchers in my room cause my dreams get so wild! In my mind these devices work, so my dreams are more controlled now.
I do always escape in my dreams. It takes a lot of time sometimes cause the technology in my dream world is the same in our real world. Laser guns are harder to avoid now and I have to keep learning more mind powers so I can stay alive in my dream.
That is why I don't like sleeping anymore. I feel like the hunt is getting harder to fight and I would rather be awake looking for a hard cock to suck. I love fucking hard dick to because it is so much being able to fuck.
My waking hours consist of making m body as healthy as possible so I can fuck more cock. I am studding Dietary Nutrition now finding out a good formula for the body.
So I fucked a nice dick on Sunday. He was a cute guy and was tested which made it so I did not have to use a EVIL condom. We fucked for a long time and it was nice. He had all these wild colors in his room which made me feel high even though we were not high.
People are annoying me to no end because they think I am high. I am not. Being HAPPY does not mean you are HIGH PEOPLE!
When did, fucking being happy mean you are high? I am happy cause, I like to be happy. I would rather be happy then fucking stressed out about some stupid bull shit.
Bull shit- My definition
Anything involving, something where someone is not dieing or hurt.
Bull shit- Drama involving nail appointments, tanning beds, hair salons, dogs, cats, (I love animals) but not enough to talk about them all the time?! walmart, target, CVS, shopping, food, (unless its food science)
What I like to talk about is, going for a hike somewhere in Alaska, Surfing waves in Hawaii, Stephen Hawking, Steven King, researching my esp science, & quantum psychics.
http://www.espscience.com
I love being a Nerd, I love Pokemon, DND, LARPING, SCA, & Amtgard ! I can talk about that to.
I also like talking about Broadway shows because I use to do them. Musicals and MUSIC is my favorite thing to talk about but I like DOING it more. Starting a Band email me if you can play something or sing
aaliyahavatari@gmail.com
Anyway I am done with this blog for now cause I gotta do makeup cause I got webcam that you can see me on here -> my twitter is @aaliyahavatari
webcam link is here http://www.directmodelslive.com/cam/AaliyahAvatari/
Please check out https://twitter.com/AaliyahAvatari for my live cam updates!
I just wish I could have a REAL Hard DICK, every time I got on cam and I would be in heaven. I enjoy the toys but nothing compares to the real thing.
My first scene finally came out yesterday and it was with @BrandonIron Nice hard dick & you can see it here ->
No comments:
Post a Comment